What does a healthy relationship look like? Many people have differing opinions about relationships and how you know whether it is healthy or toxic. Do you know a couple that you often wonder why they are still together? Here are 8 ways to tell whether your relationship is healthy:
1. Your relationship is peaceful. If there are more tears than laughter in your relationship–run! Honestly ask yourself “was I happier before I got in this relationship?” If you were, then this is not a healthy relationship. Some people are just oil and water and they tend to bring out the worst in each other. If you continually question your relationship it is most likely not peaceful. You deserve to be happy and so does your partner. If there are screaming matches that is not a healthy relationship.
2. There is consistency. Do you feel like you are riding an emotional roller coaster in your relationship. Realistically there are going to be ups and downs in every relationship, however when the highs are super high and the lows are super low that is exhausting. Your relationship should not continually feel stressful. Having a life partner should make your life better not leave you exhausted.
3. There is laughter. One of the best predictors of a whether a relationship will last is if the couple are friends as well as lovers. Do you have fun together? It is important to purposely build fun into your relationship. Watch funny videos together. Play a round of put-put golf to see who has to do dishes tonight. See who can guess the amount of the grocery bill before you checkout. Go do activities together that build memories and make you both laugh out loud.
4. You feel physically and emotionally safe. Domestic violence is a crime. You can not touch anyone else’s body to inflict harm. This includes pushing, poking, pulling, slapping, and hitting. Someone who loves you protects you from anyone who do any of those. For more information visit www.thehotline.org
5. Discussions are respectful. You have two different brains. You process information completely different than they do. Therefore, it is important that each person’s thoughts and opinions are respected and valued. Does your partner ask you questions? Do they ask your opinion on things? Do they listen to you when you speak? In addition, discussions should be a dialogue meaning each partner offers input and is part of the decision making process.
6. There is stability. If you find your self continually taking an inventory of the temperature of your relationship you are most likely not in a healthy relationship. Do you wake up every morning and think about whether you are currently fighting or things are okay? Healthy relationships have stability and allow you to relax. However, if each disagreement results in threats of ending the relationship it’s very difficult to relax and enjoy the relationship. Do you need personalize professional marriage counseling? Many couples do. Finding a local Therapist and learning healthy conflict resolutions skills can make a world of difference.
7. Each partner has friends. New love is exciting! However, the reality is no one person can fulfill all of your needs. It is important for each partner to have other people in their lives that they can vent to and spend time with. You may have heard the phrase “absence makes the heart grow fonder” can be very true. However, spending every moment together can tend to make the other person feel smothered and detached from their life.
8. Each partner has the other person’s best interest at heart. We all have basic human needs and can be selfish at times. However each partner thinks about and has their partner’s best interest at heart. There is a big difference between love and addiction. In addition, when you genuinely care about the other person you put their needs above your own at times.
Moreover, if you are considering getting married or just want to make sure you are in a healthy relationship check out this marriage course by visiting www.magicalmarriagein21days.com or you can Find a Therapist near you in your local area to do couple’s counseling privately with you.